I’ve been thinking a lot about what is my main interest, my main passion, since I was a child. As I have been interested in many things, I could hardly choose one and make it my main occupation. This made me start many things, meet many different environments and groups of people, which I find enriching. Lately, I read a book about how to make this approach productive and enjoyable, instead of seeing it as an “I don’t know yet what I want to do when I grow up” attitude.
I thought more about this approach and yesterday I found out that my current strong interest is the perfectioning of small things. Single movements, finding the right word in a sentence, the right little jump at the end of a staircase, the shoulder twist when putting on a coat. Music practice is of course on the list – my drum practice especially. All these small gestures can be brought to perfection by using only the minimum amount of energy and movement, weeding out all the rest. This is not new and not original, it is common to many disciplines; it happens to be my priority now.
This was not possible in many of the jobs I took, and that made me so uncomfortable and miserable, at the point that I was barely able to stay rational when I tried to explain what was wrong with them. Now that I put it into words, I know what I have to look for in my job search, and I am able to explain it simply, without begging for understanding. If this perfectionment is not a priority for the employer, I will hardly be a good employee in their eyes. I know I can not be too picky, but I will try to stay away from obvious misalignments of opinion.
I am not sure how much time I will keep working on this perfectionment of small things. Maybe one day I will notice that this won’t be my main drive anymore; then, I’ll be ready to go on and focus on a new objective. For now I am overly glad to have found a couple people with this same focus, and I hope to work with them as long as we like and need it.